Tag Archives: Zen

Amusing, Belize, Farming, Pets, Philosophy

Big Move For The Piggies!

Lots.of.Piggies

The Piggies have been grumbling a lot lately…about the weather, you know the usual stuff that we all get miserable about.  On top of all that, their Yoga teacher left a couple of months ago to the greener pastures of San Antonio.  There has been a lot of squealing, squeaking and squawking and general complaining on Coco-Prune Resorts.  Of course Mayor Gnome was awfully concerned for the emotional welfare of the community of Paradise Piggies and held a meeting to find a solution.

Mayor Gnome: “How can I make life better for the gated community of Paradise Pastures/ Coco-Prune Resorts and Condos?”

gnome-shiny-glasses.png

Piggies: “There is nothing to do at the resort…it’s so boring!!  What are we supposed to do in the condos…watch telly all day?”

We Are Bored!!
We Are Bored!!

Piggies: “We need a reason to live…we need to find meaning in life!”

Gnome: “Okay, Piggies, it looks like you have done all your frolicking and fun and now you want some spiritual food.  I know what you need!”

Piggies: “Oh Mayor Gnome, what are you going to do?”

Gnome: “We’re moving you to the Zen Garden.  The Zazen Duckies can help you lot get back on your feet!  No more resorts!!”

Zen Garden For Duckies and Piggies.
Zen Garden For Duckies and Piggies.

Tune in tomorrow (if you are really bored and have nothing else to do) for THE BIG MOVE!!  How exciting, can’t wait….

Amusing, Belize

Zazen Duckies Are Not Convinced!

Together

So what’s happening with the Zazen Duckies in the Zen Garden?  They’ve been giving Mayor Gnome the “Duckie Look” for weeks.

Duckie Look.
Duckie Look.

Mayor Gnome has made a valiant attempt to ignore these enquiring looks for fear of confrontation.  But alas, it seems that our spiritual duckies are winning out on this staring competition.  He finally broken down and asked them:

“What’s the matter duckies?”

Gnome.Thinking

Spokesduckie:  “Mayor Gnome!  We are embarrassed by your weak ploys and foolish manipulation to get us into those concrete monstrosities.”

Mayor Gnome:  “Oh, you mean the laying nests which I built for you to strict ISO building standards?”

Spokesduckie:  “Yes.  Do you honestly think that we would lay eggs in them?”

Mayor Gnome:  “Well, yes.  What’s wrong with them?”

Spokesduckie:  “There have ping pong balls in them!”

Mayor Gnome: “They are supposed to be fake eggs!”

Fake Eggs.
Fake Eggs.

Spokesduckie: “Well you certainly didn’t fool us!”

Mayor Gnome: “So you’re not convinced?”

Spokesduckie: “Mayor Gnome…they have “Halux 40″ written on them?”

Mayor Gnome: “Oh.”

Mayor Gnome: Unsure.

“Sorry!!!”

Amusing, Belize, Pets

How Many Zazen Duckies Does It Take To Change A Light Bulb?

Together.PointingAnswer: None.  Zazen Duckies carry their own light.

Zazen Duckies.
Zazen Duckies.

Yes, the Zazen Duckies are meditating under the dappled shade of the kenip tree.  They have even made a nesting spot out of old century plants…completely ignoring the modern luxury nests built to international ISO quality standards.  The Duckies are doing are it “the organic way.”

Oh, what’s that funny noise….

“Oi!!  WEEEE WEEEEE!!! What about us??!  Has Mayor Gnome forgotten about us?!!”

Oi What about Us?
Oi What about Us?

Mayor Gnome’s reply:

“Personally I don’t think any of you have a clue about spiritual intent but I am willing to give you a chance.  Mayor Gnome always gives chances…get ready for the big move to the Zen Garden!”

Mayor Gnome Shows Grace.
Mayor Gnome Shows Grace.

“…oh, and by the way, I contacted George Lucas…you can’t change your name to the Jedi Piggies.”

The Piggies:

“Can we change to the Ewok Piggies instead, then?”

Ewok Piggies?
Ewok Piggies
Amusing, Belize, Construction, Farming, Pets, Philosophy

Zen Duckie Coup Is Ready!

Together

The Zen Garden is ready for the Zazen duckies  and they are just in time for a Full Moon Meditation.

Happy Duckies!
Happy Duckies!

What perfect timing!  The duckies wish to thank Mayor Gnome for his superb workmanship and stamina.

Mayor Gnome.
Mayor Gnome.

The Duckie Monastery is defined by specially chosen rocks and every single rock in the centrally placed pond was hand-picked and laid down by Mayor Gnome himself.  Within the grounds century plants have been placed at each corner and there is a  beautiful south-facing kenip tree which will provide dappled shade for meditation in the afternoon.

Zen Garden For Duckies.
Zen Garden For Duckies.

The duckies are very pleased and are ready for their 12 hour marathon meditation:

“We are ready to contemplate the meaning of life.”

Belize, Construction, Farming, Pets

A Pond For The Duckies!

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Together

Everyday for the last two weeks, Gnome has been digging out a pond for the Duckies.  When Gnome was asked what machinery was used in the pond construction (I think they were expecting some sort of excavator in the answer) he replied with:

“A spade.”

Gnome Magic!
Gnome Magic!

The pond is situated in the middle of the Zen garden and lined with rocks.  Since the weather has been so dry, we were a bit dubious over whether it would get filled with rainwater.  I mentioned to Gnome with a twinkle in my eye:

“…well, since it is a Zen Garden, can we fill the pond with sand and rake ripples into it?  Do you think the Duckies would notice?”

Munchkin.Cute.Shot

No need to worry though…we had a constant drizzle today and the pond is getting nicely filled up.

Zazen Duckie Pond.
Zazen Duckie Pond.

Oh, and we have to thank our doggy for helping Gnome every morning.  She apparently thinks that a wheelbarrow should be pulled along by grasping the wheel with her teeth and dragging it along.  What a funny dog she is!   Gnome couldn’t resist shouting out to me to take a photograph…this is a picture of her in action.

Mad Doggie Fun!
Mad Doggie Fun!
Amusing, Belize, Pets, Philosophy

Emergency Meeting With Paradise Piggies.

Mayor Gnome called an emergency meeting with the Paradise Piggies earlier in the day.  If you have been following the events, you will know that Mayor Gnome is in the process of building a Zen garden to house the Zazen Duckies.  The Paradise Piggies have made a special request to move to the Monastery.

Zazen Duckies Inspecting Zen Monastery.
Zazen Duckies Inspecting Zen Monastery.

Today Mayor Gnome explained to the piggies that the moving of their gated community of Paradise Pastures would be no mean feat as their home weighs a whopping 100kg (200lb).  This would entail the movement of their home across a distance of 100 yards!  He explained to the piggies:

A Very Serious Mayor Gnome.
A Very Serious Mayor Gnome.

“Piggies, you need to convince me that you are serious about your spiritual goals because moving your house to the monastery will be a lot of hard work…”

Are the piggies ready for the next move?  These are a few answers from members of the Paradise Pastures community.

Treshawn Piggie:

Mother Piggie.
Treshawn Piggie.

“I’m ready…just need to have a baby first…”

Bob Piggie:

Georgie Piggie.
Bob Piggie.

“I’m ready…spirituality is the most important thing in my life but I need to grow some mmm…organic tomatoes first.”

Barbie Piggie:

Fifi Piggie.
Barbie Piggie.

“Yes I know I am ready and it is time to take the next step.  Yay…I want to be a Zazen Piggie!  It is all about being Jedi, right?  With the way of the Piggie, I will find the way…love and light.  The force is strong in this one…WEEEEEEEEE!”

In amongst the general piggie noise of squealing and squawking, these were the most intelligible answers that Mayor Gnome managed to get.  This was his reply:

“Piggies, you don’t seem know what you want.  Come back to me when you can all agree on a spiritual goal!”

Mayor Gnome.
Mayor Gnome.

“Jedi Piggies, huh?  Hmmmm…..what next?!”

Emergency Piggie Meeting.
Emergency Piggie Meeting.
Belize, Pets, Philosophy

A Zen Garden For The Duckies.

Together

The Duckies have set up camp outside Mayor Gnome’s dwelling  and  are demanding MGNews coverage.  So what’s up?

Zen Duckies.
Zen Duckies.

The peaceful duckies have been chanting incessantly:

“Waaa  Waaa Waaaa….Waaa Waaa Waaaa…Waaa Waaa Waaaa…”

Everyday from dawn to dusk, they have bee protesting over their terrible living standards…the coup is getting old and bashed up and fails all  duckie coup guidelines.

Old Duckie Coup.
Old Duckie Coup.

Plus they are upset over the Paradise Piggies getting all the attention.  The spokes-duckie for the group stated:

“It’s not just about the Paradise Piggies!  We duckies want freedom too.  We ask Mayor Gnome to please grant us enough space to meditate, posture and stare into space to our heart’s content.”

But, the plot thickens…Evil Goosie is hatching a dastardly plan to convert the peace-loving group into Anarchists.  He’s spoiling for a riot or anything that involves violent pecking and general disorder.

Let's Riot!!
Let’s Riot!!

Mayor Gnome has been forced to work round the clock to restore order to the farm.

Mayor Gnome.
Mayor Gnome.

This is a public statement from Mayor Gnome addressing the duckie situation:

“Dear Duckies, I have meditated over your complaints and I will make things right!  Right Thought, Right Action.  We shall act speedily and build you a Zen Garden!”

In a later interview, Mayor Gnome confessed that he had to take control of the situation quickly.  He explained,

“I know what that Goosie is up to.  I don’t want this situation getting out of hand…it would be a major catastrophe if the duckies turned to anarchy..”

Yes indeed.  Mayor Gnome is true to his word and is building a Zen Garden for the Duckies.

Mayor Gnome Hard at Work.
Mayor Gnome Hard at Work.

The Zen Garden is a whopping 30 feet by 30 feet. That should be plenty of space for the Zazen Duckies!!

Zen Garden For Duckies.
Zen Garden For Duckies.

Hooray for the Zazen Duckies!!  We have a feeling that they might get some prime-time space on this Blog…the duckies’ endeavours on the contemplation of existence is indeed worth reading about.