Paradise Piggies: Better The Devil You Know?

Munchkin.in.the.WindWelcome back to MGNews PrimeTime Sunday brought to you by Casa Mascia Apothecary. This week we talk exclusively to Mayor Gnome himself. He’s hoping for a re-election for 2015. Let’s see what his campaign is all about.

Tuff Love. Nuff Said.
Tuff Love. Nuff Said.

MGNews Reporter: Your excellency, Mayor Gnome, thank-you for agreeing to have this interview with MGNews. Tell us more about your New Look Campaign “Tough Love.”
Mayor Gnome: Kindness can be too soft and no results are gained from this. I am trying the mean and tough aspect to get Paradise Pastures back into shape.
MGNews Reporter: Some people think that you have had a personality change and you have been dubbed as “El Diablo Blanco”…what do you say to that?
Mayor Gnome: If people think I am Evil, then so be it!(HaaHaaHaa…rubs his palms together and laughs maniacally). El Diablo Blanco sounds super cool…good, good. (nods his head approvingly).
MGNews Reporter: What are your new policies for Paradise Pastures?
Mayor Gnome: I don’t have any.
MGNews Reporter: Why?
Mayor Gnome: Because those piggies are too stupid to understand anything and I don’t care! HaHa!! (more maniacal laughing).
MGNews Reporter: Well, thank-you Mayor Gnome for your disarming honesty. I suppose I could say that it was quite refreshing since you don’t get much of that in the world of politics. I wish you the best in your re-election campaign.
Mayor Gnome: HaHa!! (lots of cackling and tossing back of head).

No Rest For The Wicked!
No Rest For The Wicked!
Mayor Gnome. Gets Raw.
Mayor Gnome. Gets Raw.

What the Experts have to Say:

Dr. Munchkin (DRCOG), Medical Doctor of Paradise Pastures:

Dr. Munchkin
Dr. Munchkin

In my professional opinion, I feel that Mayor Gnome is suffering from a disorder known as “Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.” He is prone to fluctuation in mood and he appears emotionally unstable. He is also cackling a bit too much. I would recommend a that he takes some sick leave but it is virtually impossible for him to do so at such a critical election time.

Mayor Gnome’s Mother, an authority on her son’s personality:

Oh, I am sure he’ll be right…yes, yes, he is cackling a fair bit. He just needs a good cup of tea and those chocky biscuits (the orangey ones…jaffa cakes…that’s what he likes) and he’ll be as right as rain!

Archie Eagles, ordinary bloke on the street:

He’s as mad as a hatter. He’s not fit to raise a cactus let alone raise a bunch of guinea pigs!

Pedro Choc, another ordinary bloke on the street:

I like his bad ass attitude. Mayor Gnome rocks!!

Casa Mascia.  Quite Possibly The Best Soap in THe World.
Casa Mascia. Quite Possibly The Best Soap in THe World.
I ONLY Use Casa Mascia Soaps.
I ONLY Use Casa Mascia Soaps.

Well, there you go. The Doctor is worried, the Mother wants to give him a cup of tea and he is loved and hated by the people on the street. What is really going on with Mayor Gnome?? Next week, we bring you an exclusive inside story on Mayor Gnome. Maybe that will shed some light onto his personality change.

Don’t miss it…next week on MGNews PrimeTime Sunday.  6pm Central/Mountain Piggie Time.

Sunday Funday starts with MGNews.  You better Belize it!!

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